As a Board Certified Behavior Analyst, my practice services various populations, including behavior issues of typical developing children.
While I am out and about as a habit, I am always observing people and their behaviors. This past weekend was quite interesting.
Example of good behaviors: 
I was entering a WaWa convenience store, I noticed a father and his two children were departing the store. As I approached to enter the store, his young children of about 6 and 8 years old both made an effort to politely open the door for me with a smile. I looked at the father who was watching his children’s polite behaviors with an approving grin. I just had to reinforce this and said to him and the kids , ” Nice kids.” The father politely responded to me with a smile too, ” Thank you, it takes alot of teaching but it is worth it.” Little did he know that I am Board Certified Behavior Analyst who actually teaches parents how to work with their kids.
Next in the very same store, the very same trip, examples of bad behaviors: 
So refreshed from observing and interacting with children who had polite manners, I then encountered the rude children with their parents. Actually there were two sets of them in the store.
One child just almost slammed into me without looking, without saying ‘excuse me’ with his mother yelling at him to watch where he was going. Then she paid for his candy and gave it to him.
Next, I observed another two siblings, a boy and a girl rummaging through the bags of snacks, popping bags, dropping them all over the floor, making a mess with their mother and father not even attempting to watch and correct the inappropriate behaviors. Finally, when the parents were ready to check out, the mother yelled for them to come to her. No redirection, nor consequences were given to correct these bad behaviors. But the kids were given their drinks and snacks.
Parents really need to think about how they are disciplining and what are they teaching their children. What kind of adults are these kids going to grow up to be without direction and discipline?
Parents need help, support and direction.
Parents and kids can learn and benefit from Parent Coaching.
Parent coaching is available.
All parents really want good kids, but it takes lots of work!
But it is worth it.
Behavior Analyst Parent Coaching sessions are available in person, by phone and email. Visit www.askthebehavioranalyst.com for details and testimonials.
Tags: Behavior Advice, behavior coach, Behavior Coaching, Behavior Interventions, Behavior Training, family coach, Parent coach
July 8, 2007 at 8:07 pm |
Very interesting read.
I have a daughter who has really not given me or my wife any problems what so ever. Everyone around me kept saying things like, “Oh you wait till you have to wake in the middle of the night bla bla bla.” that never seemed like a problem and then the next thing I was told about was the so called, ‘terrible 2’s’ as if all 2 year olds go crazy or something.
Any way the point I’m trying to make is that not once did anyone actually advise me on anything. It was almost as if they were warning me about something terrible and all along I was thinking, “Wait a minute, I’m happy to do things with my daughter. She’s not in my way, She’s a part of my life.”
And all this made me wander whether parents actually hold in a lot of frustration about not having the same freedom as before. I actually feel more freedom WITH my daughter. I’m learning so much from her even more than before and I’m 37 and she’s 9. We do so much things together. I never discourage her from asking me so much questions. When I can’t answer them, we find out together, a bit like a team. It’s really cool !
January 28, 2008 at 5:06 pm |
Thank you for this post. I too am impressed with children who have manners because I realize that they were taught to behave that way.
I have always considered myself a coach. I inform my families that I am giving them tools to use now and in the future. I then coach them to use the tools that help improve their child’s bx. They are, after all, responsible for their own children. I am just there to help!
I have recently begun focusing my practice towards families with typically developing children. Many of the practicing Bx Analysts focus on autism, which is GREAT, but there are many families in need of our services to get their typically developing child back on track. And, of course, you and I both know the secret to changing the bx of a child living at home ;o)
It seems that the Supernanny has it figured out too!
January 28, 2008 at 6:43 pm |
Yes, I always say and teach, ABA is not only effective for Autism. Applied Behavior Analysis is also applicable to ALL behaviors ! Even a visit at your local grocery store has a land of behaviors.
Many parents of typical developing children need Behavior Coaching. Board Certified Behavior Analysts are highly trained. Though I do stress that if a parent of a typical child wants to hire a Behavior Analyst- please make sure that the BCBA professional has the educational and work experience background WITH typical kids. I DO have both – typically normal and disabilities.
Very importantly, ABA MUST be adjusted to the specific individual/group/issues etc that are to be addressed. We live in natural environments thus we need realistic advisement, interventions and some common sense too.
Thanks,
Beth